WASHINGTON - On January 21st 2017, millions of women and men around the country gathered for what is being called one of the biggest protests in US history. Originally planned for Washington DC, multiple sister marches happened around the country, all protesting the defunding of Planned Parenthood and President Trump’s demeaning comments towards women during his campaign.
While it will be impossible to declare the exact amount of people that attended the Women’s March in Washington DC, or any of the subsequent large-scale protests, experts are declaring that all media outlets should subtract anywhere from 30 to 70% of the total, as it has become apparent that many were simply confused students waiting in the George Washington University’s Package Services’ line.
Louise Hartlon, a feminist from Nevada, said, “I came all the way from Nevada to attend the women’s march, very excited to be a part of history. I was walking with a large crowd, to what I believed was the main stage where we would get to hear from multiple important speakers. I must admit I was very surprised when I found myself inside a small room with boxes and packages being thrown around.”
With the recent discovery, many are asking how no one realized that the line was so ridiculously longer than usual. However, university students are stating that they didn’t notice anything out of the ordinary.
“The lines are usually always out the door, my freshman year the line reached the Alumni House in the following block,” explained junior Michael Juarez. “We were all camped out for 3 days until we reached the door. Yeah, there were people chanting and holding signs, but I figured it was about time that GW students decided to protest against Package Services, so that didn’t alarm me either.”
Several Trump supporter students have started a petition to officially lower the number of attendees at the Women’s March and subsequent protests, claiming that they want nothing to do with it and were simply waiting for their ubiquitous Feminist Theory textbooks.
President Trump has since declared that the actual number of GW students from the Package Services line counted in the march may be closer to 1.5 million, citing a photo from the 1963 March on Washington as evidence.
