DALLAS - Fans and haters alike of rising conservative star Tomi Lahren were shocked Monday evening when Lahren announced on her show that her public profile has been an experiment in method acting.
Lahren chose to make the big reveal during her infamous “Final Thoughts,” which began with the commentator claiming that recent snowfall across the US is “proof that middle America is finally taking over” and that “liberals are literally turning into snowflakes.” After Lahren had asserted her opinion on this topic for a minute or two, she said that she had one other message for her viewers.
“I know this is going to come as a shock to all of you, but this is the last episode of Tomi,” Lahren announced. “I’m truly thankful for all of your support, and I swear that I’m not trying to make your heads explode, but I have one other confession to make: I’m not a real conservative commentator. I’ve been playing one for the last few years to break into the acting industry. I figured that if I could pull off this role, every director from Michael Bay to Steven Spielberg would be knocking down my door. And now that I’ve gotten more exposure than I ever dreamed was possible, I feel like it’s the right time to move to LA and chase my dream. I couldn’t have done this without you guys, and even though I find most of your views abhorrent, you’ll always occupy a special place in my heart. Thank you for everything.”
After Lahren made her momentous announcement, she shocked the social media world again by making drastic changes to her Twitter bio. Her newly edited statement, which read “Actress and #NastyWoman,” seemed to imply that she was a Hillary supporter during the election. For the members of Lahren’s conservative fan base, this was a blow of international proportions.
“I feel so abandoned,” one female fan says. “She was the one commentator who I could always count on to say racially insensitive things that completely ignore context--even more than anyone on Fox. And now she’s running off to Hollywood, and is probably going to become best friends with that traitor Meryl Streep, and I just don’t know what to think about anything anymore.”
Lahren’s latest comment, a response to her former fans’ devastated reactions, deepened the amazement over the difference between her conservative alter ego and her true personality.
“I knew people would be shocked, but how was I supposed to know a bunch of people would actually like this character? She basically releases a swarm of wasps from her mouth every time she speaks.”
